Ear, Ear

I’ve got something new I’m trying out for this trip (and no, we’re not talking about my pitiful efforts with the GPS). I’ve got ear plugs, and not just those disposable foam ones; these are the customised ones complete with Tiff printed on each one (just in case someone tries to make off with them).

First I had to have impressions done of my ears, which involved an audiologist squirting silicone down my ear canal which was actually quite a nice sensation. The moulds were sent off to the impressively named Ultimate Ear Protection, who upon seeing my ear moulds nicknamed me Shrek! I think they’re trying to tell me something, not sure if it’s about the size or the shape of my ears.

Anyway I am now the proud owner of two well…”things” is the only way to describe them. They’re brightly coloured and look like deformed jelly babies, but let me tell you, they certainly don’t taste like them. One is bright green and the other is red. I know the more nautically-minded amongst you will immediately grasp the significance of those colours. However not being a sailor, I have a different fool proof method for remembering which one goes in which ear. Port wine is red and you pass the port to the left, therefore the red one goes in my left ear. They’ve been great for blocking out the engine and wind noise, so hopefully I won’t be going deaf before I’m 50.